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When you made the decision, in your own mind, to hire a health coach to help you meet your health goals, you were aware that numerous aspects of your life would change -- from the food selections you make, to the size of clothing you wear, to the emotions you will experience as you begin to look and feel better, to the ways other people respond to you. Those other people include your immediate family and friends.
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Obviously a supportive partner who actively participates in the changes required to sustain a healthy lifestyle would be a gift! Having common goals is a wonderful way for couples to enjoy one another, to spend time together, to work together and to celebrate together! But if your partner doesn’t just hop on that bandwagon with you then you need to be prepared to do a little convincing in order to have their support. Otherwise, without their support your efforts could be a lot more challenging.
Keep in mind that making healthy lifestyle changes tends to highlight imperfections and bad habits in others. Misery loves company. It can be your husband, friend, mother, sister, or child who resists the changes you want to adopt. It’s common for there to be someone who might feel threatened by even the idea of a "new" and improved you. Remind them that your essence will remain the same no matter what.
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When you make changes your relationship with your partner will inevitably be affected. By working together, you can steer the changes in a positive direction! Talk to each other. Listen to one another. Be vulnerable with each other. Celebrate each other and the opportunity you have to explore all sorts of new and exciting aspects of life! Change can be scary. That’s okay. Do the healthy thing, “feel the fear and do it anyway!” Do fun new activities together. Start a project that you can do with one another. Live together. Learn together. Change together. Love together.
Your partner may not change some of his behaviors even though it would help if he would. That doesn’t mean he doesn’t love, support or want the best for you. What does it mean? It could mean any number of things.
When husbands and boyfriends are not supportive, it is usually because they are SCARED; scared of losing you (thinking you'll want to trade-up to a cuter man once you have a better body, and more confidence in yourself), scared of losing their eating buddy (how much of our entertainment time and $$$ is spent on food or eating related activities?), scared that we will expect them to give up their bad habits as well.
Spouses, especially, need to share their thoughts and feelings with one another. It’s okay to admit having fears that other people are looking at your smaller honey in a “new way.” It’s okay to ask for reassurance from each other. It’s joyful to share your appreciation for one another.
When your partner is feeling insecure in a relationship, he needs reassurance from you. Reassurance may be in the form of a soft touch on the arm, a whispered sweet-nothing in the ear, or a smile and a wink that says “You’re the one I love.” We all need reassurance from time to time. Give it to one another freely, lovingly, flirtingly, genuinely or playfully. Just give it. Your partner may naturally be a bit insecure watching you shed pounds, gain confidence and maybe strut your stuff a bit!
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Don’t forget that each of your family memb
ers and friends also need to talk about how their life might be affected as a result of your lifestyle change.
When you sign up for the Miligirl Wellness Monthly Newsletter you will receive your Free Guide "How to Convince Your Partner" as well as Melanie's "Frazzled to Free" Manifesto with 20 Tips on how to Upgrade Your Wellness Style. 
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Melanie Banayat | Miligirl Enterprises | P.O. Box 11595 Prescott, AZ. 86304 | 928-239-5656
